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Posts Tagged ‘Bard on the Beach’

Tonight I went to see Chor Leoni perform — one of my friends is in the choir and we went to the Bard on the Beach performance. It was an absolute riot! I took a couple of videos that I’ll add to this post at a later time.  The theme of the night was “No Strings Attached” and as you can probably imagine, this included all sorts of puppets, muppets and crazy tunes. There were fabulous arrangements of some well known numbers. My friend performed the Count (yes as in the muppet Count Dracula)’s counting song. Just before the song began one of my girlfriends told me about this version. I couldn’t stop laughing and will never be able to look at my performer friend the same:

Anyhow, as I went into Bard for the performance, I realized that I’d, yet again, locked my keys in my car (what has been WITH me this year???) so I got a friend to bring a coat hanger with her. After the performance we hung around my car, attempting to pop the lock. The end result of that is that a wire coat hanger just isn’t strong enough for the job. After about 10 minutes of this I called BCAA. I really appreciate their service, they certainly get me out of this mess — and it’s happened a few times this year. But what drives me nuts is that it only takes 2 minutes to get into the car. Yet it takes them roughly an hour to get to me. This is late in the evening and I’m a woman. I get that they can be busy, and that there’s a priority order. But really, a woman calling you from an empty parking lot at night? The safe thing to do is to get there ASAP to make sure she’s secure. I just don’t get that they would leave me waiting — at least put me at the top of the non-live or death list. Better yet, contract a cabbie who’s equipped to help with this to come out and handle it.  I had friends with me, but how is BCAA to know that? I was pretty frustrated because this isn’t the first time! The funny thing was the driver of the car drove right past me — even as I was jumping up and down waving like a madwoman. I called BCAA back and got told ‘we haven’t dispatched a car to you’. I responded with “He just turned into the parking lot and drove right past me, there’s no other car here who else would it be for”, they called the dispatcher and it turned out he was for me.

Even funnier? There was a cluster of people hanging out waiting to make sure that three thirtysomething women, one holding a balloon (a long story), jumping up and down waving a coathanger talking and laughing loudly weren’t trying to steal an 11 year old car.   I felt like the world’s most incompetant thief — especially since I failed to break into my own car…

The people though? They didn’t check on us, ask us what we were doing, find out that I’d locked my keys in my car, or even check to make sure I was safe and not in trouble. They just hovered and followed us out of the parking lot when I was finally able to leave.  Brilliant. Is chivalry really dead in Vancouver? I’m beginning to believe it’s gone from here forever. It’s true. If I’m ever to meet a man I’m going to have to import him if even retirees wont help.

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Tonight I had a lovely evening seeing Twelfth Night at Bard on the Beach. I went with a few friends of mine, and unintentionally met up with another friend of mine. It was an evening full of delight and laughter. It definitely made me smile and it was a fun relaxing evening.

After, one of my friends and I went for a walk, and got talking about life.  Some of it came because one of my dearest friends got engaged yesterday (I’m thrilled, by the way — but I wont say any more, yet, as I don’t know if this friend is finished telling everyone yet), some of it came from the stress and intensity of the other week.  And that’s where the title “I don’t compete” comes in. I have a habit of hiding how I feel, of not showing it, trying to minimize it. This is on many levels, but right now I’m thinking particularly about relationships. When there’s ‘risk’ I don’t want to take it.

That being said, I am trying to learn how to be more honest and open and able to let guys know what I think.  But, I will not compete. 90% of the time, if I am aware that there’s a competition, I back off.  Thinking back, even to the post on July 18th, was somewhat related. The guys I was noticing surrounded by women are guys I wouldn’t necessarily date at this point in time (and some are a 100% absolute never), one of the reasons I would not jump in there and join in is the same idea: I DON’T COMPETE — even when from my perspective the guy’s just a friend… I’ll still back off.

This past weekend. I went to a blues party in Seattle, and I was particularly conscious of this idea, and I was chatting with a guy I’ve met once or twice (but don’t really know), he had his arm around my shoulders at that point. While we were chatting, a girl walks up and gives off those signals that women can give off that say ‘back off, he’s mine’. I won’t compete, so I left them to it and danced with someone else (awesome dance it was too, by the way… yay good yummy Seattle blues…). It turns out they weren’t dating.

Yet this is all well and good, but it seems that sometimes it’s inevitable.  There’s the friend code, of course, but it seems that sometimes, when there are so few men around who are ready and available for a good relationship, paying attention to that code too much means that no one would ever date. So that means, for me, being willing to take the risk, be more open. And sometimes, it’s going to backfire.

I suppose what this comes down to… there’s a game out there being played, and I apparently need to re-learn how to play it, backfire or no.  And maybe that means competition (though I hope not), but I still won’t initiate a competition, nor do I want it. But I wont run scared from it. Not anymore.

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